"We almost expect women athletes to not be classically beautiful or feminine, and therefore we’re not surprised to learn they’re gay. Male professional athletes, by contrast, are thought to be our most masculine specimens. So when they come out as gay, it seems they’re playing against type. Even more than with femininity, masculinity and heterosexuality are widely perceived to be linked. For all the progress that’s been made, there’s still a perception that the bullied gay kid is spending his after-school hours curating a Lana Del Rey Tumblr, not practicing with the varsity basketball team. The bullied teen lesbian? She’s the one on the court."
"Communication is important. Mutual generosity is important. Men’s inner emotional lives are important. Women’s sexual boundaries are important. And vice versa on all counts, of course. But when talking about sex, female trauma is not subordinate to male frustration. Men not “getting” enough sex from their chilly wives (as though wives couldn’t possibly want sex, or be justified in not wanting it) has been our oversimplified narrative for generations. Prioritizing men’s sexual issues over women’s is not a revolutionary, maverick stance—it is the status quo dressed up as progressive pablum. And exploiting one couple’s very specific emotional trauma and dysfunction in order to support sweeping, regressive generalizations about the sexual function of entire genders is utterly fucked up."
#seriously WSJ WTF
"it is possible to be too good. The unassuming Mary Wrightly, a “good, polite little girl who spoke in a small, soft voice” and the heroine of “Mary Wrightly, So Politely,” by Shirin Yim Bridges (“Ruby’s Wish”), finds that retiring girls don’t always get what they want or deserve. Often, they are simply ignored."
#Shirin Yim Bridges
"The study’s authors noted that female passengers were generally less likely to ride in unpopulated cars and often tried to position themselves relatively near to a conductor, presumably out of “personal security concerns.” Because still, in the 21st century, that’s part of the day-to-day routine for most women: having to be a little bit more scared than everyone else, and planning your day around potential attacks you have to assume people will try to enact on you. Really, pretty fun."
"Encouraging women and people of color to take more risks and be more aggressive might help somewhat, but if those risk-taking behaviors aren’t rewarded (or, in some cases, even safe), then the people who end up getting ahead will still be white men. Entrepreneurial activity will probably always entail a certain amount of risk — the only way to level the playing field would be to extend to young women and minorities the same indulgence that white boys get. It’s hard to say what this would look like — encouraging more kids to steal or get in trouble with the cops isn’t very good public policy. But there are ways in which (white) boys’ misbehavior is treated as natural and expected, even if it results in worse grades. Those who worry about boys’ education have advocated for letting boys be boys a bit more, but maybe we really need to let girls be boys."
The thing about being a little black girl in the world who is already, at nine years old, confident enough to demand that lazy, disrespectful reporters call you by your name, is that most people will not understand the amount of comfort in one’s own skin it takes to do that, will not be able to grasp the sheer fierceness of it, the boldness, the certainty, the love for yourself, and will not be blown away at seeing you do it, though they should be.
The thing about being a little black girl in the world is that your right to be a child, to be small and innocent and protected, will be ignored and you will be seen as a tiny adult, a tiny black adult, and as such will be susceptible to all the offenses that people two and three and four times your age are expected to endure.
But take heart.
"Secondly, let’s assume for a moment that it’s true that women aren’t as assertive as men. Let’s assume that there’s some sort of biological imperative that causes women to focus more on doing good work rather than jockeying for attention and respect from their peers. Why is the conclusion, then, that *women* should change to gain equality?"
#Harvard Business Review
Study looks at the demographics of New York Times obituaries over the past 70 years. Some of the findings:
• In the 1940s and ’50s, the paper ran many more obits than it does today; some were but a single paragraph.
• Prior to 1960, cause of death was not always included; today, it usually is. In our survey, aids was first listed as a cause of death in 1992.
• Where the dead were educated has remained relatively constant: The Ivy League reigns supreme.
• The obits have always been male-heavy. In 1972, a typical female obit was two paragraphs, and spoke not of the deceased’s accomplishments but of those of her husband and sons.
• Starting in the 1990s, the obits became more diverse, racially and ethnically, but also in terms of people who had distinguished themselves in occupations other than business or politics—attorneys, artists, scientists, athletes, and actors.
Previously, the appalling gender ratios of mainstream media’s obituaries.
(Source: , via bustr)